For weeks, my neighbor\u2019s underwear waved proudly right outside my 8-year-old son\u2019s bedroom window. They were bright, lacy,<\/p>\n
and plentiful \u2014 and quickly became the unintentional stars of our suburban skyline. It started on laundry day. I glanced out the<\/p>\n
window and nearly dropped a pair of Batman briefs \u2014 Lisa, our new neighbor,had her thongs flapping in the<\/p>\n
breeze like neon flags. My son, Jake, stared and innocently asked, \u201cAre those slingshots?\u201d<\/p>\n
Trying to preserve some childhood innocence, I closed the curtains and made a joke about underwear preferring privacy. But<\/p>\n
the parade continued. Every day, more lace. More string. More questions \u2014 including whether Lisa\u2019s<\/p>\n
\u201ctiny undies\u201d were for ahamster, or if she fought crime and needed them for aerodynamics. Finally, I had enough.<\/p>\n
I marched to Lisa\u2019s house to ask if she could move her laundry elsewhere. She scoffed, told me to \u201cloosen up,\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
For weeks, my neighbor\u2019s underwear waved proudly right outside my 8-year-old son\u2019s bedroom window. They were bright, lacy, and plentiful \u2014 and quickly became the unintentional stars… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1307","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-news"],"yoast_head":"\n