I’m 28 and getting married in two months after spending over a year planning every detail, including hiring a chef for a special menu featuring truffle risotto, handmade pasta, and fresh-baked bread. My stepmom, who was diagnosed with celiac disease last year, insists the entire wedding menu must be gluten-free. I offered to provide plenty of gluten-free options for her and any other guests, but she refused, saying I was excluding her and accusing me of being ableist.

Things got worse at my bridal shower. My stepmom arrived with a batch of gluten-free cookies she claimed she baked as a thoughtful gift. But after guests took a bite, they started coughing and desperately reaching for water because the cookies were packed with an overwhelming amount of cayenne pepper.

She later admitted it was intentional, saying she wanted me to understand “what it feels like to have nothing to eat at an event.” Instead of proving her point, the stunt upset my guests and turned what should have been a joyful celebration into an uncomfortable scene.

Now she’s threatening to skip the wedding unless I replace the entire menu with gluten-free food. I’m standing by our original plans while making sure she’ll have safe, delicious options to eat, but the family conflict has left me wondering whether I’m being unreasonable or simply protecting the wedding my fiancé and I worked so hard to create.